Vardaesia Read online

The hours she’d spent climbing the mountain had eaten most of the day—by the time she and her friends had arrived back at the stadium, sunset had been breaching the horizon. It wasn’t yet late enough for Alex to go to bed for the night, despite her exhausted body, mind and spirit, but she offered no arguments when Zaylin tersely gestured for her to dress in the silky pyjama set laid out before her. The pants flowed down to her ankles and the top had sleeves long enough to cover her wrists, the ensemble soft against her aching body. But even better was the crystalline chalice that Zaylin shoved towards her once she was dressed—a chalice with a familiar silver liquid inside it.

  “You have laendra here?” Alex couldn’t help asking, causing Zaylin to raise an eyebrow—perhaps because the name of the flower was Tia Auran in origin so she understood, or perhaps because that was the Meyarin word for it, and therefore she still had no idea what Alex was saying.

  Realising that it didn’t matter how or why the flower grew in Tia Auras—but guessing the Meyarins must have taken some samples with them when they were banished to Medora—Alex didn’t hesitate to drink the liquid. It had been warmed already, just as Niyx had brought it to their training sessions. The nostalgia was like a kick to her already bruised stomach, but she continued swallowing the vanilla-caramelly offering, feeling all her aches and pains begin to disappear—the physical ones, at least. Oddly, her fatigue remained, but given the day she’d had, she was hardly surprised.

  “Thank you,” she said again, handing the empty chalice back to Zaylin.

  “Rorsae,” the helper said in response, a terse order to ‘rest’. And after pointing to the bed so that her command was understood—and giving what looked very much like a glare of warning that her instruction had better be followed—the Tia Auran disappeared.

  If Alex hadn’t known any better, she might have thought Zaylin had just revealed a hint of concern—in her own, abrupt way.

  Sighing wearily, Alex moved across the room and carefully slid Niyx’s letter into the drawer of the small bedside table, where it would be kept safe but also close. She then curled up on top of the covers, fully intending to follow Zaylin’s orders.

  She knew she couldn’t hide from her friends forever. She knew she would have to answer their questions eventually. But she also knew she needed more time to fortify her emotions enough to make it through her explanation.

  As her room darkened from sunset to twilight, Alex allowed her thoughts time to settle; allowed her heart time to heal all over again.

  It was fully dark before her rumbling stomach made her consider leaving her room to get something to eat. But she wasn’t sure if she was ready to face anyone just yet.

  As she was deliberating, Alex felt the bed depress as a weight settled in behind her. But she didn’t fear the intruder, well aware of who had joined her.

  “How did you get in here?” she whispered.

  “Turns out I felt like climbing some more today.”

  Alex rolled until she faced Kaiden who was lying on his side, his chin resting in his palm as he looked at her. Light from the three moons washed over him, shining in from between the wispy curtains leading to the balcony. The glow flickered shadows over his face, but still allowed her to see his lingering concern.

  “You climbed in here?” she asked.

  “It wasn’t far,” he said. “I’m only in the next room over.”

  Alex didn’t care how close his room was. Their location in the palace had to be hundreds of feet up in the air. If he’d fallen…

  “You’re crazy,” she told him.

  “I was worried,” he said, reaching out to touch her cheek.

  She closed her eyes at the soft brush of his fingers, soothed by the gesture.

  “I’m a lot better now,” she said quietly. “I just—I needed some alone time. After watching that all over again, I couldn’t…”

  She trailed off, not sure what she was trying to say. But Kaiden didn’t need her to finish.

  “I thought that might be the case,” he said, just as quietly. “It’s why I didn’t come before now.”

  Alex looked towards the closed door. “Are the others angry?”

  He shook his head. “They’re confused. They don’t understand what they saw, that’s all.”

  “Did you… tell them anything?”

  His fingers tickled across her cheekbone, tracing invisible freckles on her skin. “No. It wasn’t my place.”

  Alex let out a small sigh, both relieved and disappointed.

  “You know you don’t have to answer their questions,” Kaiden said. “If it’s too hard—if you don’t want to—”

  “I know,” Alex whispered. “And I won’t tonight. But soon…” She swallowed. “Soon I’ll have to explain. I owe them that much.”

  “You don’t owe anyone anything, least of all to the people who love you. They’ll understand.”

  His words were so firm that Alex believed him, feeling his assurance burrow deep into her bones. More than anything, it allowed her the courage to know that she would be able to answer her friends’ questions when the time was right. She knew she didn’t have to, but she wanted to. She’d kept Niyx a secret from them for long enough.

  “You missed dinner. Have you had anything to eat?” Kaiden asked, likely in response to her again rumbling stomach.

  “What gave me away?” Alex replied, a small smile tugging at her lips—a miracle in and of itself after the day she’d endured.

  “You’ve had the laendra, though,” Kaiden noted, his fingers moving down her arm to entwine with hers, stroking the clear skin which was no longer scraped and bloodied.

  “You too, I presume?”

  He made a sound of confirmation, and then softly called, “Sorin?”

  This time Alex was surprised by the arrival of a new person, enough that she jumped as a bright flash heralded Sorin’s entrance.

  “How may I be of service?” the Tia Auran asked politely in his native language, not even raising a brow at finding Kaiden in Alex’s room—and on her bed. Their positions were innocent, but it might not have looked that way to an outside observer.

  “Dahana, tornas,” Kaiden said, repeating yesterday’s request for some food.

  Sorin bowed and disappeared before Alex could protest being hand-delivered a meal when she could just as easily venture into the common room, so instead she addressed her objection to Kaiden.

  In response, he asked, “I thought you weren’t ready to answer any questions tonight?”

  Alex understood what he was implying. “Are they all waiting for me?”

  “Ready as an ambush.”

  Alex grimaced, then said, “Dinner in here sounds great, thanks.”

  Kaiden chuckled lightly and sat up with her when Sorin returned with another bright flash and a covered tray in his hands. He passed it to Alex and then clapped three times, light appearing from nowhere and everywhere all at once, just like when she’d stayed at the Meyarin palace. Yet again, Alex wondered how much of the Meyarins’ advancement as a race had originated from their years in Tia Auras.

  “How do I say ‘thank you’ to him?” Alex asked Kaiden as she lifted the lid off the tray to find a meal laid out for her.

  “Merrah mai.”

  Turning to the helper, Alex said, “Merrah mai, Sorin.”

  A beaming smile broke out on his otherworldly face, and this time he bowed to her as well before disappearing with another flash.

  “I like him,” Alex said. “He seems nice.” Unlike Zaylin.

  “He is,” Kaiden agreed, helping himself to what looked like a golden apple while Alex began tucking into the rest of her plate. “He’s delighted that I know enough of his language to communicate a little. He’s asked a lot of questions about Medora—I think he’s not so secretly intrigued by our world.” Kaiden looked away and quietly amended, “My world.”

  Reading him better than he would have liked, Alex nudged him with her elbow and said, “You had it right the first time. Our world.”


  He turned back to her, just watching for a moment, before a smile slowly formed. “Our world, huh?”

  Alex raised a hand, indicating everything around them. “You think I’d be here doing all this if I didn’t plan on staying in Medora once it’s all over? I still have at least a year and a half left at Akarnae—more, if I’m selected as an apprentice.”

  “And you will be,” Kaiden said, taking another bite of his golden fruit. “So that’s two more years.”

  “And it’d be a shame to waste such a valuable education by not working in a field where I can use my trusty Combat or Stealth and Subterfuge skills on a daily basis,” Alex continued dryly, enjoying their wishful conversation. They both knew such a future might never come to pass if Aven wasn’t defeated, but the normalcy of the exchange brought some much-needed levity to their day.

  “Having saved the world, one would presume you’d be offered your fair share of employment opportunities,” Kaiden said, his serious tone at odds with the teasing light in his eyes.

  “Frankly, I’d be insulted if they didn’t give me a crown for my efforts,” Alex replied, causing them both to snicker.

  “Queen Alexandra it is,” Kaiden said. He then grinned widely, timing his next words for when Alex raised her goblet to take a sip of sparkling juice. “That works well, since I’ve always thought ‘King Kaiden’ has a nice ring to it.”

  To keep from spitting her mouthful all over him, Alex sucked it back too quickly, the bubbly liquid burning as she choked it down.

  Sending him her best glare when he burst out laughing, she couldn’t maintain her annoyed expression for long before she too descended into laughter. As audacious as his words had been, they were just what she needed to pull her from the sadness that had engulfed her since finishing their earlier test.

  Quietly, she said, “Thank you, Kaiden.”

  “Anytime, Alex.”

  His words were as soft as hers, his meaning clear. He would be there for her—any time she needed him.

  Blinking quickly against the burn in her eyes, Alex cleared her throat and focused on finishing her meal.

  “I wasn’t listening earlier,” she said, after swallowing some kind of sweet vegetable. “What time does tomorrow’s test begin?”

  With a twitch of his lips, Kaiden answered, “What time do you think?”

  Alex scrunched her nose. “When all this is over, I’m never going to get up before dawn again.”

  Kaiden chuckled. “Five more days. I have every bit of faith that you can make it.”

  Again, his meaning went beyond his words, and this time Alex smiled softly in gratitude.

  She finished the rest of her food while Kaiden repeated some of the stilted conversations he’d had with Sorin, telling her how the helper had grown up in the palace after being born to a family of royal servants. Many of the other helpers were the same, most of them so content with their station that they wouldn’t even entertain the idea of living beyond the golden walls. As far as they were concerned, they had the best lives in Vardaesia and loved serving the empress.

  “Could have fooled me,” Alex said, thinking about the temperamental Zaylin as she pushed her tray away. Immediately, it disappeared from sight.

  “For a man who doesn’t stop talking most of the time, he didn’t say much about your helper,” Kaiden admitted. “Even when I questioned him directly.”

  Alex wasn’t surprised. She doubted the prickly Zaylin would be happy if she learned her fellow helpers were gossiping about her.

  As if the Tia Auran had been summoned by thought alone, she appeared in a flash, her arms crossed as she glared between Alex and Kaiden.

  “You are not resting,” she said, her melodic language unable to hide the irritation in her tone.

  Keeping up the guise that she couldn’t understand, Alex turned to Kaiden in question. His eyes sparkled with humour as he played along, translating Zaylin’s words.

  Alex exhaled almost too dramatically. “I don’t suppose she’ll believe that I haven’t left this bed since I last saw her, will she?”

  With a quick smile, Kaiden answered, “Judging by the look on her face, probably not.” His smile grew and his voice lowered as he finished, “And you might want to be careful how you word that, especially since she found me here with you.”

  A strangled laugh left Alex’s lips even as she felt heat touch her cheeks.

  “Well, we wouldn’t want to give her the wrong idea, would we?” she managed to say, pushing Kaiden off the bed. “You heard the woman. I’m meant to be resting.”

  Chuckling quietly as he stood, Kaiden leaned back down to brush his lips against her warm cheek—his affection now familiar, and not at all unwelcome.

  “’Night, Alex,” he whispered into her ear before he rose again.

  “’Night, Kaiden,” she whispered back. But then, remembering how he had arrived into her room, she quickly added, “Use the door this time.”

  With humour dancing across his face, he turned and strode from the room—using the door, as she’d directed.

  During their quiet exchange, Zaylin had stood sentry, her arms still crossed, a glare still on her face.

  “You need to lighten up,” Alex told her, not caring that her words would mean nothing—in fact, relishing the fact. “Smile once in a while. It won’t hurt, you know.”

  “You seem to be in a better mood,” Zaylin responded.

  Alex blinked in shock before she realised that the helper was merely commenting on her livelier disposition rather than having actually understood what she’d said. She managed to freeze her expression just in time to keep from reacting further to the Tia Auran’s statement—a slip that would have been a dead giveaway that she could interpret the ancient language.

  “Nevertheless,” Zaylin continued, uncrossing her arms to rearrange Alex’s pillows before pushing her roughly down onto them, “you still need to rest. Today was hard on you. Tomorrow will be harder.”

  Why do you care? Alex wanted to ask. Not out of anger—out of curiosity. Even last night when Zaylin had spat her awful words about failure, they had been fuelled with enough passion to imply that the Tia Auran did care whether Alex succeeded or failed. But for the life of her, Alex couldn’t figure out which side Zaylin was leaning towards.

  “Sleep now, human,” the helper said, clapping her hands three times until the room descended back into darkness. “I’ll awaken you in the morning.”

  And with a final flash of light, she was gone as well.

  Nine

  The next morning dawned bright and clear, with an almost exact repeat of the previous day, including Zaylin’s less-than-gentle wakeup call, Alex’s unnatural fatigue, and the group breakfast in the common room. But this time, on top of their nervous anticipation of what challenges the second Gate might bring, Alex’s friends were watching her cautiously, not knowing what to say or how to treat her.

  She was surprised. She’d been fully prepared for their ambush upon leaving her room after her bath, but none of them had said anything other than to enquire how she’d slept. They were walking on eggshells around her, and she couldn’t blame them, considering she’d locked herself away last night.

  When the uneasy silence at the table became too much, she cleared her throat and said, “About what happened yesterday…”

  Immediately, three pairs of eyes jumped straight to her, while Kaiden deliberately continued eating to offer her some normalcy, and Declan too, since while he must have also been curious, he wasn’t as desperate for information as her closest friends.

  “I don’t have time to go into everything right now,” Alex said, knowing the full story would take much longer than the minutes they had before their next Gate. “But that Meyarin you saw yesterday—Niyx Raedon—he wasn’t who you think he was. There’s a lot you don’t know, a lot I couldn’t tell you for a number of reasons. But until I get the chance to go into detail, all you need to know is that Niyx was one of the best people I’ve ever known.”
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  She pushed her food around her half-empty plate and forced herself to continue, her voice barely audible. “He died saving my life, and that’s a sacrifice I’ll never be able to repay.” She made herself meet their eyes. “But it’s also one that he’d never expect me to.”

  Alex could see that her friends didn’t understand. That they were dying to ask questions, to know how she could so staunchly defend someone they had all believed was Aven’s most loyal friend. But she hadn’t been wrong about their limited time— even now, Zaylin was gesturing impatiently for her to return to her room and get ready for their next task.

  “We’ll talk more about this later,” Alex promised, rising to her feet. “But—Just don’t cast judgement until you’ve heard everything. He doesn’t deserve that. And neither do I.”

  With nods of agreement—some hesitant, some more assured—Alex sent a small smile around the table and followed after Zaylin. Yet again the process of preparation was a replica of the previous day, right down to the similarly ridiculous Amazonian warrior outfit she was expected to wear.

  “What happened to the pants?” Alex grumbled to Zaylin, tugging at her skirt. “Tomorrow, I vote we try for those again.”

  The helper ignored her, too busy roughly braiding her hair—as if Alex were incapable of dressing and grooming herself—and then promptly shoved her out the door.

  “You have a nice day, now!” Alex told her in a saccharine voice just before she flash-transported away, the glare on Zaylin’s face telling Alex that her tone had been enough to get the message across.

  Repressing her snicker, Alex approached her friends, who were already waiting. Barely a second later, brightness surrounded them, transporting them directly to the centre of the golden stadium.

  I guess I was cutting it a bit close today, Alex thought, understanding why Zaylin had been so impatient that morning. Or perhaps not, since that seemed to be the helper’s usual disposition.

  “Here we go again,” Bear murmured as light overwhelmed them and the stands filled with the Tia Auran audience.

  Alex couldn’t get over just how many of the otherworldly beings were in attendance. If anything, there were even more today, as if word had spread about the humans undergoing Tu’eh Saeron ess Telari. But they weren’t all that had changed in the stadium. Unlike when Alex had arrived yesterday, the three fiery arches weren’t floating above them; instead, they were still hovering in the clouded gap beside the dais. Ignoring the fact that the Gates were baseless and should have been structurally incapable of maintaining their upright position, the three of them looked almost innocent, offering no indication of the challenges to come.